Bob Deakin Short Stories

The Office Gallery and Art Studio. That name, and I don’t want to type it again until I have to, makes an excellent phrase for a typing class exercise. It took me about eight takes to get it right with no errors. I type fast and careless and that’s not a very forgiving title for folks like me.

It seems a good setting for a studio/gallery, although a bit off the beaten trail of downtown Orlando, Florida. It’s only a couple blocks from Lake Eola, which makes it charming in the afternoon, and not-so-charming at night. The interior looks like a studio, with doors off the corridors providing entrances into diverse little worlds of artistic creation. The décor is sparse yet there always looks as though something is going on when you walk in.

There’s got to be a better name than The Office Gallery and Art Studio, however. How about the Off-Disney Playhouse? Let’s throw that one by Mr. Eisner. I’m sorry, that would be Robert Iger, new CEO since 2005.

The Office Gallery and Art Studio is surrounded by large buildings owned or formerly owned by large banks, legendary local developers and a courthouse, how about the 800-Pound Gorilla Gallery? It has a certain ring.

It is a studio, and it is a gallery, and it is on E. Robinson St., so how about the East Gallery Robinson? That could be abbreviated to E.G. Robinson and be mistaken for a landmark celebrating late film legend Edward G. Robinson for added publicity and mystery.

Let’s pigeon-hole all of the artists who work here and call it the Art Deco Shadow, in honor of the Courthouse design and it’s looming presence, even though it’s built to the north and will never be able to throw a shadow on this building unless there’s a real big fire on the other side.

Try this one out: The Citric Acid Think Tank. It’s Orlando, so the citric reference works. Citric Acid is an ingredient used in lots of foods that Floridians eat, and Acid, on its own, was a performance-enhancing substance used by artists way back when, and some claim even in modern times, adding a bit of romantic art history to the discussion. Also, the phrase Think Tank could be confused with Washington “think tanks,” adding to the merriment and the publicity.

How about the Orange City Workshop? No. That would be confused with Orange City, Florida, the Volusia County town that’s just far enough away from the Atlantic Coast to piss you off as you head for the beach.

Using the word Orange in the title is impossible, unfortunately. It’s too obvious and too out-of-date. Anyway, the days of smelling oranges near downtown Orlando ended around the time Epcot was being built. Hmm. How coincidental. How did that happen?

Sun City Studios sounds nice but one might expect to see Elvis and Johnny Cash. Additionally, Orlando is “The City Beautiful,” not “The Sun City,” which is El Paso, Texas’s nick name.

With major delays in Orlando’s Downtown redevelopment in the past few years, a subsequent flood of available space in the Orlando area, and the recent economic crisis, no one’s really sure what the future holds for The Office Gallery and Art Studio, so for now let’ just keep calling it The Office Gallery and Art Studio.

Never mind.

Copyright 2010

The White Loop trail winds around the bend at the Hal Scott Regional Preserve and Park in Orange County, FL. Photo by Bob Deakin

An off-road distance runner’s dream, the Hal Scott Regional Preserve and Park is as rural a setting as imaginable just outside the Orlando city limits, yet as far away as possible, environmentally speaking. There are no phones, restroom facilities or drinking water on the property, just lots of trees, grass, wet prairie, ponds and canals.

Three separate trails ring the park, each laid out in rough circles, joined in the center near the park entrance. There is a 6.3-mile yellow loop, a 6.1-mile red loop and a 4.3-mile white loop, each approximately 15 feet wide and covered with worn grass or hard-packed sand. Considering the distances, it is ideal for a distance runner looking to break away from the confines of city streets and pounding concrete, or a mountain biker looking for an easy ride in the middle of nowhere. As long as the trails are, they cover a mere fraction of the 9,515 acres of park property along the Econlockhatchee River.

The park has several designated camping areas, which are open year-round and popular with school groups and equestrian clubs, as motorized vehicles and hunting are not permitted. The camping areas are little more than clearings alongside the trail, but for a group with plans to ride, hike or explore, the park is expansive and holds a variety of landscapes. Wildlife includes bobcat, gopher tortoise, river otter and indigo snake, and the area has protected zones for endangered species including the red-cockaded woodpecker.

Serenity defines the Hal Scott Regional Preserve and Park. Even the drive to get there is quiet once outside Orlando. It is not a place to travel alone for most, as safety in numbers is advisable. A few minutes into a run or ride and one is in the middle of deep Florida bush, with only the birds flying overhead having any view of civilization. The only other sign of human interference along the trails is an occasional opening through the forest revealing a glimpse of smoke trails from the nearby Stanton Energy Center, which is quite a stark contrast of images on a clear day.

The St. Johns River Water Management District’s Division of Land Management is the primary owner and overseer of the property, in cooperation with Orange County. The Hal Scott Regional Park and Preserve was originally purchased in separate parcels from private landowners from 1992 to 1998 with assistance from the Florida Department of Transportation, Orange County and the Orlando-Orange County Expressway Authority. The park is named in honor of the late Hal Scott, former president of the Florida Audubon Society (now Audubon of Florida) from 1971 through 1980, a partner in the former Herndon, Iles & Scott insurance agency in Orlando and a long-time advocate of the preservation of land along the Econlockhatchee River.

The park is located at 5150 Dallas Boulevard in east Orange County outside Orlando city limits and at least a half-hour drive from downtown. It is located south of Bithlo approximately ten miles southwest of East Colonial Drive (S.R.50) and five miles north of the Beachline Expressway (S.R.528). According to the St. Johns River Water Management District, the park will eventually contain restroom facilities and connect with Long Branch Park to the north.

As running or biking areas in Central Florida go, Hal Scott is not among the most spectacular – such
as Hontoon Island State Park or the Lake Norris Conservation Area – but beautiful nonetheless, more so for those interested in plants and wildlife, which is, of course, the purpose of the preserve. There is little shade to be had and barely any waterfront areas to sit and relax or take in the sights. Many of the trail areas are also not passable in wet weather, and once off the trail it’s bushwhacking through the wilderness.

These are trails for strong runners or novice mountain bikers. In respect to the natural setting, lack of facilities and spotty Cell phone coverage, bring lots of water, sun block, and alert someone before using the trails, particularly in extreme heat.

Copyright 2010

Frankie suffering for his art.

“Can’t you knock first?” shouted Frankie, the red-faced artist, angrily, raising his pallet so that only his eyes were visible.

He was standing in a small, poorly-lit room, with various objects carefully sprawled about the floor while staring at his painting of a pirate. Included were everything from an ashtray and industrial adhesives to nude photos, bottles and buckets. This was a scheduled visit by the students from Stetson University to see his latest work in progress, but Frankie was not quite ready to show it off.

Everett Thomas, the art teacher leading the students, apologized as the students filed in and quickly viewed the display before leaving. He then had a brief, tense chat with Frankie before heading out with the students. Frankie agreed to come and speak to the group a few minutes later and offer insight into his current work.

The students made their way to another room and sat to discuss the show. Energy was high and they were bouncing in their seats to make comments.

“It was an unconventional display of art of course, but aren’t they all,” Mr. Thomas began. “Did you notice how important it was for the artist, right there, during our tour, to re-position the bucket in such a carefully chosen location? A true artist is never satisfied with random placement of his subjects.”

“It was amazing,” Tiffany interjected, her hands on her knees in glee. “That was such a compelling statement. I don’t know where to start. I’ve never had a work of art hit me like that before.”

“I see a man of the sea in horrible pain,” offered Seth, frantically attempting to explain Frankie’s use of color, texture and ‘found treasures.’ “His ability to emote an emotion is incomparable.”

Other students followed in praising the artist’s work, complimenting everything from the pirate hat in the painting to the mop in the bucket on the floor.

Twenty minutes later, Frankie finally arrived to talk to the students and answer questions.

“What was the message you were trying to send with this phenomenal work?” Mr. Thomas said, kicking off the questioning.

“I must start by apologizing to you all about this project,” Frankie said, his face painted with extreme disappointment. “I’ve been up for three days drinking beer, sniffing glue, looking at porn and trying to fix this goddamn leak in the ceiling.”

Copyright 2009

The straw hat weirdo. Drawing by John Coutinho

Last month, Adam, one of the artists an off-Disney studio in Orlando, Florida, after a long night at the easel realized only too late, when he was home, that he had left his iPod in the kitchen of the studio.

“If somebody finds it they’ll hold it for me,” he assured himself as he lay his head on the pillow for the night, comforted by the camaraderie of his fellow artists.

He returned to the studio in the morning and was absolutely steaming when he found his iPod stomped to a million pieces on the kitchen floor.

“Who the hell did this?” he asked, in deep angst, in no particular direction.

“It was a skinny guy with a straw hat, torn overalls and worn-out floppy shoes,” said Seth, another artist, stepping into the kitchen to counsel Adam. “I’ve seen him before. Real weirdo.”

Last Tuesday, Juan, another artist at the studio, had just completed a sculpture of LAX Airport, cut from a single piece of teak wood. It was a commissioned work and took him nearly ten weeks to complete, and was the darling of the local art scene. The sculpture sat on display in the studio gallery for all to see, awaiting shipment to the West Coast.

That afternoon at the studio, Keisha, after bidding farewell to her tap dancing students, looked up into the security monitor at her desk and couldn’t believe her eyes. There was a skinny guy wearing a straw hat, torn overalls and worn-out floppy shoes, swinging an ax at Juan’s sculpture, which was on fire. Something told her this wasn’t right and she got up to investigate.

By the time she got to the gallery he had put down the ax and was hurrying out. The sculpture was chopped in hundreds of pieces, all of them burning. The heat and smoke set off the alarm and the police and fire departments were on their way.

“He was very skinny, with a straw hat, torn overalls and worn-out floppy shoes,” Keisha said to the officer, who introduced himself as Dan Short of the Orange County P.D.

“Did you notice anything strange about his behavior?” Officer Dan asked.

“He was very weird,” she said. “When I asked, he said he was here to fix the plumbing but he wasn’t dressed like a plumber, and it didn’t look like a plumber’s ax that he was wielding.”

“That is weird,” Officer Dan responded.

Nothing more came of it until this morning when Amy brought in a brand new espresso machine for her fellow artists and proudly set it up on the kitchen counter. By noon it had been inexplicably ripped from the wall, thrashed around the room and tossed out the two-story window and splattered on the sidewalk.

Tears flooded down her cheeks when she walked into the kitchen and discovered the vile act.

“What? Who! Why?” she screamed, and was soon comforted by friends, all staring at the carnage in disbelief.

“It was the skinny guy with the straw hat, torn overalls and worn-out floppy shoes,” Seth divulged, as everyone stared at their feet in search of an answer. “I don’t know where he comes from but he’s a real weirdo.”

Just then everyone looked up, shocked to see Seth adorned in a straw hat, torn overalls and worn-out floppy shoes.

“What a weirdo!” Amy screamed at him in horror.

Copyright 2010

The Lake Eola Centennial Fountain in front of the Orange County Courthouse.

Lake Eola Park is one of Orlando’s most cherished landmarks, home of the band shell amphitheater, the Farmer’s Market and many of the town’s most storied events long before Walt Disney ever flew over swampland in Central Florida.

The wide, lighted, paved path around the lake covers about a mile and is ideal for walking, running and gazing at the water and the tall buildings huddled around it. Along the way is a large playground, Japanese Pagoda, gardens, foot bridges, several areas for concerts and theatrical events, lots of space – both grass and paved, the Relax Grill restaurant, swan boat rides and permanent restroom facilities on each end of the lake.

The park is not ideal for serious runners as there are far too many people, strollers and other obstacles to break the rhythm and possibly hinder the safety for all involved. One obstacle is parking. Public parking is available nearby, across the street in all directions, but the walk to them is long enough to make it a chore, not to mention paying for the privilege to find a dark, lonely spot. Free parking is available on the east end of the park and surrounding streets but the odds of finding an available spot are about the same as winning the next 10 kilometer race.

For runners who live or work downtown, it is an ideal place to get in a few miles, take a break and go home or back to work if they have that luxury. If there is a concert at the shell, the Farmers’ Market, a road race or other event taking place, the park is a great place for a long walk with friends, with plenty of options to dine on location, nearby in the center of town or to the east in Thornton Park. When Lake Eola is bustling with activity, there are few places in Downtown Orlando more enjoyable on a nice day.

Currently, the Centennial Fountain is down for repair, and the circular orb looks strangely alien in the middle of the round lake. It was struck by lightning this past September, which necessitated long-awaited repairs both technical and cosmetic. The European-inspired fountain was originally constructed in 1957 to celebrate Orlando’s 100-year anniversary, and it has been the symbol of Orlando on magazine covers, newscasts and postcards ever since. It is an iconic image not to be forgotten and without question makes the atmosphere at Lake Eola.

With regret for any perceived offense to the City, a major downside to visiting Lake Eola is some of the other images captured there. It inspires the mantra of visiting of a major urban area: keep your eyes straight ahead and don’t talk to strangers. There is a police presence, and the park is typically populated enough to prevent problems, but the feeling can be unsettling, particularly to women and children. A recent visit provided witness to open drug use under one of the trees and heckling of passersby from a small gathering of visibly intoxicated, disheveled men around several benches.

The park is beautiful and obviously cared for by diligent workers and residents tending to the gardens, landscaping, structures and wildlife. The City is obliged to keep the park open to everyone, and officials have worked very hard and endured a lot to keep it that way, but unfortunately it is beyond their control to keep everyone in line. It is a large urban area, and people will be people, but the atmosphere can take an occasional hit as a result.

Lake Eola Park is located at 195 N. Rosalind Avenue, about one mile east of Interstate 4 off Exit 83. Be prepared to search for parking, and perhaps make a day of it when visiting another area of Downtown Orlando. The Orlando Public Library is just across the street and the Orange County Regional History Center is nearby. All in all, Lake Eola is a wonderful place for walks, strolls and runs when the time is right.

Originally published on Examiner.com Orlando in 2009

Copyright 2009